Sex in an RV – Oh, where to start?
As the full-time RV lifestyle continues to gain traction, more and more families are considering life on the road. When you realize this lifestyle is not only possible, but very doable, questions start to consume your thoughts.
Money, insurance, space, socializing, education, electricity, water – the list goes on and on. One of the less talked about topics that every full-time RV parent thinks about is sex. “How will we…’do it’?” “How do we hide it from the kids?” “What will we tell them when they inevitably find out?”
Well, one courageous member of a full-time RV Facebook group asked that question.
“My family and I preparing for our new life on the road. While downsizing and sorting, my husband ask, “How will have ” adult time” in this type of living?” It got me wondering as well. How do you find time an space for intimacy living in such small quarters? We have five kids BTW. TIA.”
The comments that followed were nothing short of spectacular. When you live in an RV, “close” is an understatement. Privacy is, to a large degree, a thing of the past.
So what do you do when you need to have some adult time away from the kids? Here are my personal favorite answers to the less talked about question every full-time RV parent has thought about.
“You get creative and try to find small bits of time when you can. Sometimes its exciting to have a “quickee” while son is walking the dog!”
The RV lifestyle, in every aspect, is filled with adventure. Finding time and a place for sex when you’re raising kids on the road is no exception. And why not? Everybody likes adventure, right?
“While laundry runs, while they watch a movie, after they are asleep. My 4 (kids) know if moms door is closed, don’t enter without knocking.”
Children need to have respect for personal space – especially the personal space of adults. “When you get that feel’n” and your house is 500 sq ft, respecting space is a lesson that comes with the lifestyle…Every. Single. Day.
“windy days are the best”
Our daughter isn’t to the age where we have to provide an explanation but we’ll certainly remember this when that time comes!
“we’ve been yelled at a few times!!… we have 4 kids… one being a teenager and she will yell if her tv starts shaking”
I bet that’s an awkward conversation – emerging from the bedroom after your teenager makes it obvious that she knows what y’all are up to! Does it get less awkward over time?
“May have to consider early morning….. you usually can’t stay awake longer than all the kids but you can definitely wake up earlier.”
I’m not a morning person 🙁
“We find a warm shower after really helps start the day a bit more awake! And you have to learn not to be as……. vocal….lol.”
We’ve justified the shaking. Now we just have to find an excuse for the strange animal-like noises coming from the bedroom!
“Whenever you feel like it. We have six kids and don’t restrict ourselves.”
I had a hard enough time with intimacy while my wife was pregnant. I just felt like I was intruding. Kudos to this person! I’d have to build up to that kind of comfort.
“Hide 4 dollars in the other room, tell them you hid 6, thank me later.”
This is brilliant on so many levels! Fun and games for the whole family!
“My kids are 9, 10 and 14. We tell them to go play outside, or you will hear mommy daddy time. Works for us. We don’t hide it, they know, its adult time, come back in an hour. Guess it also depends how old your kids are.”
I’m a fan of this! I think “sex” has been a “no-no” for far too long. I’m a Christian and I don’t believe in sex before marriage. However, I don’t think it should be something we hide from our kids. Sex is awesome under the right circumstances! I think hiding that fact does more harm than good.
“My kid is old enough to know why the house is shaking…”
Even more reason to just be honest, assuming they are at the right age (whenever that is).
“My son is young so we just wait for him to sleep. When he gets older we will just be honest haha. We don’t hide sex.”
Good for you!
“Creativity. Long walks, behind a tree.”
Nothing like a bit of creativity to spice things up in the relationship!
“Before the kids go to bed, I slap (wife’s name) on the butt and tell the kids that “it gonna be a rough one tonight!” We gave them handrails to hang onto their bunks.”
We rank our fun sexy times based on how many kids end up hitting the floor from the camper’s rocking. 0 kids, well we got it done; 1 kid, yeah buddy; 2 kids, the HEAVENS HAVE OPENED!”
Hahahaha! I don’t care if this is true or not. Handrails and a ranking system?!? This is genius! It’s like the adult version of “3 little monkeys!”
“Our camper shakes. And my 7 year old son use to think it was an ‘earthquake!’ But the other day he says.. ‘mom I know when you and dad are big kissing.. cause the camper feels like an earthquake and you guys shut the door and lock us out’.”
Poor kid! Hopefully they kept the “vocals” down. I can’t imagine anything more terrifying as a kid to hear Mommy and Daddy alone, screaming in the bedroom, in the middle of an earthquake!
“daddy is giving mommy a massage…. which is half true cause that’s how it starts….”
Oh, the massage! I think it’s a universal fact – men are simply incapable of giving a “no strings attached” massage. And there are all kinds of different massages, right? I’d say “a massage” is 100% truth!
And last but not least…
“We learned that if we didn’t make it a big deal, he didn’t either. It forced us to have open convos about sex, and he wasn’t only getting messages from the media. At 17 he now has a lot of respect for sex and sees as it an act of love. We also invested in stabilizers.”
I agree. I think hiding sex is teaching our kids that we should be ashamed of intimacy. Nothing good comes from teaching one thing and doing another.
That said, I think it’s a delicate topic. I don’t know how we’ll handle that inevitable conversation when the time comes. And I certainly don’t know when the “right” time is to introduce this topic.
What I do know is that sex is great and I think it should be presented as such under the right circumstances.
I also know that “full-time RVing with family and sex” is an incredibly entertaining Facebook discussion. I hope y’all enjoyed reading the comments as much as I did!